Ok.
This is stupid.
But I am mother-fuckin' in love with BB.
Damn it.
Who the hell would have thought that we would get back together? It's bullshit, but I'm starting to believe the "Love is sweeter the second time around" thing. Good Lord.
I mean. What's up with that?
My sister has absolutely no reason to be mad at me. She could get irritated with me, sure, but to be ANGRY with me and HATE me -now that's pushing it. Twice tonight she got my attention just to tell me how she hated me. And why? I don't know. She doesn't fucking tell me. She's one crazy bitch and proving it.
If she has a problem with me, she should tell me. Now she's acting like the sons of bitches in her high school. They fuckin' have no breeding. Seems everyone has their own superiority complexes, they're fuckin' spoiled brats and they rub off on each other. They all should fuckin' shut the hell up. Not because they study in a school where everyone's so smart doesn't give them the right to act bitchy or above other people.
These people are mother-fuckin idiots. Their brains are not going to get them far in the real world. They need to fucking realize that the real world can be such a bitch and sometimes, even the most stupid person would end up successful. Don't they realize that though their IQ might be higher than the next person, they defecate the same awful shit?
Just like this god-awful schoolmate of hers. Sure, it's a given the bitch's mother was rich. AND SO!? They both study in a fuckin public school. What right does this little girl have to act all high and mighty around people? Wake up call, you 16-yo-bitch, your mother can die. ANY TIME. If I were you, I'd fuckin' be nicer to people AND put FOOT POWDER for your stinky feet. You're not fuckin perfect, you know.
NO ONE IS. NO ONE HAS THE RIGHT TO BE A BITCH. GO TO HELL YOU MOTHER FUCKIN IDIOTS.
I am not surprised.
My auto-self-defense mode is acting on again. It wants to save me.
I'm all I can save.
BB and I are good together. Now I can finally admit I really do love him. After being with him again, I realize that yes, I do feel for the guy. So much that even I am tempted to alter my fate. But the temptation is only so much to bear.
Love is one thing for me.
Once I realize I love someone, this happens. I give up. However, now, I would do things differently. If I 'forgot' those men before, I would try not to lose him. I would try to keep him, even as a friend.
I would never say goodbye.
But this is how things work: When I love you, I give you up.
If I don't, we'll hurt each other eventually.
When do we stop sacrificing?
Isn't it a despicable feeling when people you've managed to forget suddenly make themselves known to you?
Damn. I hate it when this happens.
